Random marks & color theory.

Didn't get to my journal and paintings until late tonight, so instead of starting anything new, I pulled out some basics and added to pages that already were near being finished. Do you do that? Add idle doodles or random marks just to get your hand moving, the paint and color flowing, all the while never knowing that, in those moments, you may add just what something was missing?

I have a metal leaf adhesive pen that makes my silver leaf look worn and uneven, and I love it.

Marks in reddish orange pastel over blue and green. Exploring more color relationships. These are complimentary colors, and create strong contrast. I listened to the TV as I just kept making mark after mark. Repetition. I never appreciated it before.

I'm not a huge fan of the color green, but I've been exploring its various shades and hues as I continue to study color theory. I like reading about all the different relationships and then hitting my journal to figure things out. I'm in love with the cadmium red hue I bought a few weeks ago...such a bright, brilliant red...which means I need to find a green to pair with it that doesn't look like Christmas! But as you can see here, it goes so well with teal, which is my favorite color, so it all worked out!

The reds on the right are analogous colors, meaning they're next to each other on the color wheel, with one being a primary. Still some contrast, but not as strong as the others. 

See? All sorts of things to learn, even late at night, making random marks...

It's okay to be semi-creative.

Some days, despite all the best intentions, you just don't get to do as much creative play as you'd like to.

And that's okay. If out of the past 22 days, today is the first that I haven't done much art, then wow, I've really been doing good! I've already accepted that I won't finish something each day, but I'm glad that I'm working.

Instead, I talked offering ideas with a friend, read for a bit, and worked on cleaning up another digital page on my iPad. And went to see Star Trek for the second time (when I told my mother, she seemed disappointed that I've only seen it twice!) with a friend before a quick dinner of Chinese food. 

Honestly, if there's one thing I've learned this month, it's that we need to take time for ourselves away from the house. Diving into my art practice is helpful, and has been helping me cope for years, but I'm also learning that I need to get out, clear my head, and be. 

I'll leave you with a quick picture I took of the digital work I did today...just clean up, details, and some fun. She'll get more jewelry tomorrow, and a background. I'd like to add a quote or song lyrics....so if she reminds you of any, let me know! 

Day #21 of Everyday in May!

Kinda reached a milestone! 21 days of blogging art everyday. It's certainly lit a fire under me to get creating and put down some color each day.

I've been working on a bunch of digital drawings/paintings/art journal pages on the iPad to put together the final lessons for Digital Adventures as of late. I haven't been able to keep up the pace of one a day, since they take as long as a regular art journal spread or page, but I'm still playing and discovering new things.

For example, I'm toying with a new way to paint hair. What do you think? It's so easy but gives the impression that I've spent a long time with it! Magic!

I'd like to call this one 'Growing Wings,' as they don't sprout all at once, but grow as you do.

Paint & Color.

Today's been a long, exhausting, kind of sucky day. So I turn to paint and color on a canvas and in my art journal to cheer me up.

The first few layers of something. Done on a Blick Studio Artist's Board....and I have to say, I really, really like it. I grabbed a couple when I was there in Berkeley, and the weight, texture, and way the paint moves/dries on it is awesome. I may have found my new favorite! Plus, they're ready to hang!

I really love the colors, and the gold is yummy, but do you think it's too much? I'm thinking I may paint over a substantial amount, since it seems to be overpowering. What would you do next?

And some layers in the art journal. I love writing into wet paint, and the new doily I picked up in the dollar bin at Michael's last weekend. It makes such a cool shape. And the gold paint just coated everything so well! Here is where the gold is beautiful, but not over-powering. On the left is some fluorescent pink/red (it's darker in larger concentrations; I flipped a stencil over on the page after spraying through it for a bit). Just loving everything about this bit right now. What would you do next? Or would you leave it alone? 

I'm almost finished with my book (ahem - a really good, long Star Trek fanfic, actually! *geek*) and am turning in early to finish it. I'm wiped and it's only 10:30pm. I'm getting old! *grin*

make a pattern. repeat.

I love making patterns...repeated marks on the page to be used as hand-cut stencils, perhaps. It's a bit easier on the iPad than in the physical world, but mark-making has become my newest love.

I also painted a bit on this amazing machine. I've learned so much, and continue to refine my abilities...

How was your weekend?

Like free journal page.

Managed to grab a little time for myself today. I like having one day a week when I can be lazy and ignore my to-do list, and today was that day.

Still, I managed to play. I often find myself grabbing for my journal when I see someone wearing an outfit I like on tv or in a movie, my skills far enough along that I can quickly take down a sketch.

What inspires you right now? How can you capture more of it?

I almost feel like the air is charged with ideas, and I'm running around with a butterfly net. I'm always ready to churn something out!

How far have you come?

Trapped in the waiting room for nearly 20 minutes, I dug my Moleskine out of my purse and searched with my hand for pencil...only to find there was nothing inside.

And then I remembered this post by Alisa's husband Andy, about drawing with a ball point pen, and thought this would be the perfect opportunity to try it out. 

Was I scared? You bet! Drawing with a pen is so permanent....no room to erase or change things if you mess something up, like and eye or part of the nose. Best to draw and erase and strive for perfection -- NOT! I don't know how I was able to draw the girl above with a pen, while sitting in one of those uncomfortable waiting room chairs, where time stretches on forever (in a most unpleasant way), but when I sat back and looked at her, all I could think was: 

When did this ability develop? 

It's not the best. But the fact that I was able to do it with any sort of proficiency astounded me. While I learned to draw and began keeping an art journal years ago by drawing daily, those were things I was looking at. I'm still learning to pull more and more from my imagination, but wow! 

In an effort to get a conversation going, I thought I'd end these little posts by inviting you to participate. I've been going back and answering comments, and want to reference them in future posts. For today: 

When was the last time you allowed yourself to be in awe of your talent?

I'm sure your friends have complimented you, and you may have brushed off the kindness, not believing in how far you've come. If you haven't sat back to see all the steps you've already taken in this journey, perhaps today is a good time to do so. Find some old journals and look at what used to be your "best." How far have you come? How much have you developed? 

Remember:

Chart your course and keep to it.

This post brought to you by Samie realizing the point to a recent lesson , so we're all going to believe in ourselves this weekend! Go paint/draw/collage/create!

Reworking layers.

Spent the evening watching the 'Elementary' season finale while working layers on her face...I feel pulled to finish the WIP stack in the corner of my space.

Sea & Sky

Have you ever put an old CD in, half-remembering what it is, and then a song comes on and you're jolted from your seat to years earlier, the summer sun on your face, in a different city, and different place in your life? 

Who is that you that you go to visit? And why do we then play the song over and over again? Is it to create a stronger tether to this earlier time? 

Perhaps it's to escape. While we may be in control of our present moments, they can sometimes get away from us. Spiral out. Life becomes so complicated, you no longer have time to repeat mantras or remember all those lessons you've learned from a magical book or person. And then, suddenly, you're somewhere else, remembering the silly commercial this song played on and where you were and wow, have I come far from then. 

I love the unexpected connection that is coming from posting every night. I know I'm pushed to sit down and create, if only for an hour, just so I have something new to share. There's something about social accountability that keeps me, most of the time, in line! 

For example, Susan Jane commented that I shouldn't ink the entire flower in the painting below because it adds tension. After sitting with it for a few days, I could see her point, and decided it only needed a little bit of gold to finish off the piece. And so, I declare this painting finished. 

It's hard for me to let it be simply because I love paintings with central figures; even flowers….ah, I see how that works! Sometimes I just have to write things out to figure out why I feel a certain way! 

It is 17.5"x23" mixed media on reclaimed wood and available for purchase. I love it so much, I'll be making prints. 

And I played around with a new idea I had the other day, that is, using progress shots of paintings as backgrounds for quotes. Just a little fun to be had! And this quote really spoke to me and what I'm thinking/exploring right now. 

I leave you with some pages from my journal. I think I'm finally settling into things and getting on to exploring expression and story. Even hair and details. All three are destined for canvases (two are already half-done!). Never forget the power of paper and pencil…you can literally create worlds. 

Painting play date.

I needed some time away to give me a chance to relax and refill my well, and I'd told Shelley all I've been wanting to do lately is paint, so she said hooray and I headed over after taking care of Mom for a bit. 

I like hanging out with Shelley. She just got back from Pixie Campbell's latest painting retreat and filled me in on all the magic. Oh, how I long to go one day! As long as I can continue to pull in video clients and start attracting consulting clients (both for how to make your videos better -- and you could do well to make them better! and painting clients), I may have a chance. Possibly. If pigs fly. 

Keep an eye out your window! 

I'm slowly updating my Etsy shop -- physical collage sheets went up, and some of the older prints were re-listed. I'm hoping to post new prints soon, but to be honest, I'm no longer in any rush. I don't want to overwhelm you with all these things I'm releasing. I may still have a shifting audience, or perhaps everyone's making their way back over, but I think I need to do some thinking and journaling before I step back out. 

Anyway, Shelley is a breath of fresh air. She wears the jewelry I want to wear. Makes essential oils and balms -- she's a little apothecary (though she'd never call herself one!) in the shade of a mountain with cute pups wandering the house. She spins thread and yarn and has a beautiful collection of objects that form an alter. We met on Facebook via Pixie but probably would have met through other friends at some point. 

I'm finding there are people swirling around me connected indirectly yet tightly bound by the same ideas, same needs and wants and quests. And I feel as though the universe is pulling on those threads, ever so slowly, and asking more and more of me, stretching my abilities and yanking me from my comfort zone. 

Plus, I'm a bit wobbly when it comes to stability, drawing-wise. Just look at the three girls I was working on today…they're all different, done within the same week, worked on today, and yet I still find my hands moving in new ways. What does it all mean? Will I ever figure things out? I'd love to find a way that's steady enough for me to stretch out into illustrating stories/scenes, as Gwen has asked me to try (she's one of the people pushing me!). 

We'll see what happens. I'll be rendering a lot of video tomorrow, which serves for ample doodling time. 

Isn't this just the best color combo? 

I framed this print of my Tiara painting and OMG am I in love with it! She now has a prominent place on my wall, a shining reminder that we all need to remember our crowns!

Old school cut and paste.

Spent the afternoon with a pile of color copies of journal pages, a pair of scissors, & a yummy green tea smoothie thing that ended up making me feel yucky (caffeine and I don't get along very well).

When I started making collage sheets oh-so-long-ago, I didn't have a tablet, or iPad, or any way to easily create them digitally, so I started this tradition of making nice with the copy machine at my local office supply store for a bit before finding someplace calm to cut out whatever caught my eye. The process is simple: 

Look through pages. 

Cut out patterns/images/spots that are interesting.

Play Tetris on sheets of white paper until VOILA!

Collage sheets.

I've been so in love with my work as of late (as in, pretty colors/patterns/marks!) that I walked out with 26 copies in my hands and spent the evening trying to puzzle things out. You want a good balance between big and small elements, between general stuff and detail-y stuff, etc. Does that etc make sense? Anyway, more things that should be considered.

I'm a sucker for collage sheets myself, which makes creating them easy. All I have to do is ask: does this sheet look fun to play with?

Since I'll be playing with my own copies of these tomorrow, I think I've answered the question!

Right now, I have a question of importance to ask you.

Do you like downloads (instant gratification) or physical sheets (fun in the mailbox!)?

Since I'm expanding my Etsy shop tomorrow/this week with more prints/paintings/little things, having physical collage sheets isn't a big deal anymore. Just let me know in comments, please?

(If you like downloads, the sheets have been uploaded here for your purchasing pleasure.)

And Gywn, sorry that there's a link there at the end; I don't want to fall back to impersonal saleswoman speak (it's exhausting anyway!). Relating my day, and makin' something for y'all was what I did. Well, that and wheeled mom around a bit. Got videos up for Digital Adventures. Watched Star Trek. Am posting from bed. 

Seeking patience.

I started this painting 5 or so years ago; an old profile picture shows me sitting under the tree in my front yard, wearing a long cotton prairie dress, meticulously drawing. 

(I had to ask someone to come out and take the photo, which makes it a recreation of a spontaneous moment, but I love it all the same, especially the headphones hanging around my neck.)

I've never been one for great patience when painting. I like abstract work, or portraits, sure, but when it comes to taking the time to add all sorts of details, my eyes begin to cross. It all sounds like so much work, and I'm just here to have fun. 

Except I love paintings with detail! Maybe not the perfect replications of real life, but pieces where care was taken. My journal pages gain detail through being carried with me everywhere, and my habit to pull it and some markers out on days when I don't have much energy. Stuck, I can't help by keep making marks, adding one atop another, finding depth. But paintings are a bit too big to do that with!

And as I started inking this flower from the past, I realized I wanted to spend more time on it in order to make it right. Create the true vision in my head. I may have just fallen in love with big brushes and under painting, but I'm more importantly giving my work more respect from the person who matters most -- me.

Emerging.

In the last month, I've started collecting large brushes.

I mean 20, 30, and my favorite, a 40 round mural brush. Even on smaller pieces, these large brushes allow me to cover so much space, to make large looping brush strokes, add more texture, mix paint on the canvas.

(Not that I use canvases anymore. I now work on birch panels from Lowes or Blick panels.)

I am in love with working from general to detail. When I helped a friend by painting large 4'x2' panels for a puppet theater, I started by laying down wide swaths of color, general tones, working out the under painting. Then, I started adding details, progressively using smaller and smaller brushes. 

Here's what emerged from my brush today. It took a lot of procrastinating to get a brush in my hand...organizing paint, cleaning dried paint off my palette...but as the conversation flowed with Larissa, allowing me to work unconsciously, I finally got back to painting, the best love of life and fantastic distraction from hip pain. 

Layers to come. This is just a snapshot of progress, a peek in the middle. The girl is to be a pirate with shells in her hair. The other, who knows? Isn't that the fun part?

Sifting for gold.

I just wrote this elegant blog post, and then the app crashed on my phone. I toted the joys of true moblogging, which is still buggy, yet so much more than we had years ago, a decade ago, back when I programmed my own Blogger site (before they offered it all wrapped up in a neat little package).

I shall attempt to remember what I wrote. 

I haven't traveled anywhere exotic or interesting today; I'm still trying to figure out my summer plans, who's couches I'll be sleeping on, who will have me. Until then, I let my art be the fantastical different world we all yearn to see or visit, especially with the advent of Instagram.

But I sit just the same, at the end of the day, panhandling for the shiny bits, sifting through the muck for those gleaming moments. Human life is messy and complicated yet so simple and straightforward; we all are covered in muck, some more than others, waiting for the right person or people to come along and see the gold under the surface. Each day, no matter how dirty it may get, there are always those nuggets left at the bottom, a tiny fortune each of them, as they represent the bits that make the rest bearable. 

I did that with this journal page. It got away from me at some point, and instead of racing to put it on life support and try and rescue it, I allowed it to spiral out of control, to become imperfect and a mess. It folded in on itself like a collapsing star, brilliant for one moment and then gone. I watched as it happened and let it. It can be incredibly liberating!

So here are the shining bits, the gold at the bottom of the pan, the pieces I loved if a crumbling whole. I even went further, transforming a part digitally, going further, inside out, stretching that feeling of not being satisfied or in love with a spread into a new kind of joy at what I could pull out of it.

You should always look at what you create in such a way. Where are the nuggets of gold you've spent hours searching for? What parts are amazing and why? You'll find it much easier to sit with a less-than-stellar page that way. 

Works for messy days, too.  

Rest up.

My head is swirling with so many thoughts right now, I don't even know what to write. I just want to breathe, and settle. Not let the unsubscribes feel like flat out rejection of both me and what I create. Remember that it's been one day and I need more to change the world.

Today, as I loaded my mother into the car, and then packed the wheelchair in the trunk, the nurse said to my mother, "Wow. If there was someone to take care of me, I'd want it to be her."

I didn't know I'd done anything more than be empathetic and pull up past experience.

But now I am exhausted and laying in bed and wishing for some time to myself to rest up. I hit a wall and need to get back up to strength to take it all on again next week.

Creating the new economy.

I'm going kind of radical today.

I'm sitting bedside; Mom is resting, & doing better. I'm rendering videos for clients & classes in the background, waiting for things to be shiny enough for me to continue working.

For years, I have been inspired by Gwen Bell. As she grows, I see the chance for growth and rebirth double, triple, continue on with success. Even having a business burn down didn't stop this woman!

Sometimes, we have ideas but are too afraid to voice them. Are afraid they may fail. And that's okay. It's natural. Sometimes, we need others to take the step first so we can follow. It gives validation to our idea, shows us that the community as a whole is moving towards something greater. Bigger.

I've been toying with the idea of a circle economy for awhile. I have bartered my way up the food chain, which has brought me where I am now, a place where I get to do what I love every day, meet amazing artists, and create the kind of content I've been dreaming of for years. I get to use cool words like clients and business trips. I get to visit new cities, network, meet new people. Become infused with new ideas. 

Any student who contributes to the monthly 'zine gets paid. If they contribute lessons, they get compensated. It isn't much, but it's something. I want more participation, more circular teaching, and less of a direct Me --> You classes. I want Me -- > You <--> Us. Digital Adventures has turned into this (the self-study option will have student-submitted downloads and lessons!).

Here is something that has been going through my head for the past four months:

If 80% of the members over at The Studio donated $2.25 a month, I could give away all my classes for free.

This is crowdsourcing at its finest. If the crowd, those 600+ members, all got together and gave $2.25 a month in donations for an entire year, I could give away my classes. I'd have enough to pay the bills, invest in more equipment & materials, & eat. You would be supporting me directly, with the change you find in your pockets at the end of the day. Isn't that an amazing thing? And if every "like" on FB gave $.80, the same would happen -- free art, painting, art journaling, and digital classes for anyone who wanted to take them. 

Of course, this only works if the commitment is both ways. If you commit for a year, I will. I will be all over the community. I will do more videos (I currently produce 4 personal videos a WEEK, just for classes & the Creative Warriors Circle, that the public never sees). I'll produce the 'zine with your content and pay you a flat fee. 

I've seen what everyone else does, and I want to be different. Try something new. Go out on a limb. So when I reach my goal of $275 a week, I will open up all my classes, downloads, and products in the Shoppe. Come and get them. Enjoy. Pass them along. Let's try to make a new economy, where we all support others.

And if you need a few dollars a week, let me know. I'll come over and empty my pocket.

Donate via Gittip here. What I receive is public. 

If you'd rather work via PayPal, use the buttons below. I will publicly post the information. 

If you sign up for a year, I will give you access to what is going on now. Please note that if I do not reach my weekly goal and you cancel payments, I may remove your access. This only works if I hit that goal. Please give only if you can, generously, without expecting the moon in return. 

One Time Donation

Choose your amount:

$2.25/ Month : $2.25 USD - monthly $5/Month : $5.00 USD - monthly

Hospital corners.

Last night, as I was sitting down to blog, I received one of those phone calls you never want to, especially when a short errand has taken too long.

Today has been a whirlwind of phone calls, errands, and care-taking. Bones will mend (though may take a year), hearts will grow stronger, and a new (used) car will be found, but for now, I am thankful that things weren't worse, and keeping my composure while watching those I love suffer.

A friend read about the accident on FB and surprised us with a pressure cooler full of soup; I started to cry on the phone when she said she was on her way over. There was no way I'd be able to cook, and we needed to eat. I thought that was something that only happens in movies.

I've never really had something like this happen before; we're all a little out of our depth. Be careful tonight/this morning. Take the extra time so you're not in a rush. Cherish carefree days and moments.

I will remember to take care of myself. Time for bed. Blogging from my phone, as I am too tired to pull out the laptop.

(Ps please don't ask for more details in comments, as I have told those in life who are close to my heart the best I can. I rarely share personal stuff on here, and feel weird doing so...but I promised to blog my heart, and here's what's in it.):

a library arts education.

Did you know that if your paint feels dry, but is cool to the touch, there's still evaporation going on, still drying?

I feel that huge shift happening and I know it's time to also go deeper with what I learn.

The last time this happened, I enrolled in my first real art class and learned the basics of drawing, composition, and the shift of the artist's eye. I loved it. Even when I hated it, when I cried out of frustration, and wanted to walk away, I loved it. As my teacher said, "Now you can only go up." 

This time around, I decided to check out my local library & see what they had to offer. I want to learn more about color theory and acrylics (& mediums and how to use them to their limits) so I can bring a new level of maturity to my work & not go through so much uncertainty while working. There is so much to be said of being self-taught, but you have to remember the taught part. We can learn to access our imagination & inspiration by ourselves, and understand color, and draw forms, but at some point, you have to turn to books or teachers or mentors to get further. The adage is true - you have to learn the rules to break them, and I truly, deeply believe that. If it takes me reading sourcebooks and guides and looking through art collections, going on museum tours and visiting galleries, then I gladly study. 

And you should be learning, too!

Browse YouTube, and you'll find all sorts of artists eager to share their wisdom. Save up and invest in a local class -- not only will you learn new things, but you'll be plugged into the local art community through the students (I found that community colleges are affordable & your teachers are fascinating!). Take a trip to the library and walk past the mixed media books for the straight up art books to see what you can glean. Become interested in the mediums and tools you are using!

Go deeper! 

I'm learning about how acrylic paints are made. I've always wondered what it meant on the side of them: acrylic polymer emulsion. Why do colors get discontinued? Why are some more expensive than others? Is it worth it to buy those beautiful, expensive paints, or are they all the same under different brand names?

Don't you want to know more?

I do.

Done on the iPad. Can you believe it?

I am a fangirl.

Judi and I met in 2001 on a message board for fans of the TV show Alias. We both loved the same character (Vaughn!) and often chatted, along with others, in his character thread, then one-on-one via MSN messenger. We've kept in contact since then, and when I moved to Phoenix in 2009, I was able to finally meet her in person. When we first met, I was fresh out of high school and she was recently widowed, but our joint love of Alias, JJ Abrams, Star Trek, comic books, and consuming large amounts of fanfiction has kept our friendship strong, especially now that we can text each other and meet up on a Saturday afternoon to see Iron Man 3 in IMAX 3D. 

I had to stop us as we walked out of the outlet mall I wanted to walk (with my leg issues lately, I want to make sure to take a long walk every day) to capture a picture of us.

Those are the pictures I want more of. Me and the people who matter to me, the events that shape me, the moments that matter. Not random shots of my feet (though I did buy fluorescent red Converse; Judi reminded me that treating myself to art supplies is still for work, and I need to really gift myself once and awhile) or pretty trees. Yes, they are fun, but I want to capture the daily moments. And write a little more about my personal life (outside of art and inspiration and FMS) here. 

I love the movie, by the way. I've been a faithful reader of the Iron Man comics for years, and squeed like the fangirl I am. 

PS. I'm writing daily for the month of May. You can sign up for posts to email on the sidebar over there.

I am tired of faces.

I had a totally different thought this afternoon, but wanted to make this daily diary thing easy, and that means writing my heart. 

I am tired of faces.

Totally, completely, bored with faces. 

For the past year or so, I have been practicing. Studying. Doing graphite portraiture and realistic pieces, cartoon and illustration types, big and little and focused on tiny details omg get them right! I have studied them with graphite, charcoal, colored pencils, crayons, oils, and acrylics. Even paint pens. And all I can show for it is a desire to draw them fast and expressive and get on with it! 

I have faces with necks and....nothing more.

I became so focused on all the details that I lost the forest for the trees. I would get lost in seeking perfection and lose spontaneous expression. By the end, my girls would be staring blankly into space and I just....gah. 

So I started creating animal girls, totem girls, as I journeyed on my own Heroine's Quest. I was opened up to the world of animal wisdom last summer, and have begun remembering my dreams. Sometimes, I'll hear a random animal's call, or see it repeated across a day or two, and know it's trying to tell me something. And so my girls morphed into something new, again.

And then I was reminded of something old, an illustration style that was expressive and spontaneous and didn't take days to finish. I pulled out the originals and found myself itching to draw like that again, to create for myself an environment where I could be imperfect again. Where I could draw fast and sloppy and speak from the heart.  

So now I can turn that laser focus to the gothic lolita dresses I've loved for years and want to draw. I can work on learning color theory. I can go BIG.

That's what I have been called to do. Paint BIG. Stand and dance as I spread paint across the canvas. Look at my new, giant brushes!

TODAY: Woke up late, worked on a couple project, and felt Friday fall on my shoulders when I heard those words we all hate: your car needs to go in for repairs. Ugh. That fell with a couple other things, and I had to draw a new map through emotion. Went to the library. Bought good, organic, non-GMO fed foods for a yummy dinner. Try kombucha & forgot fermented = not good for gluten-free me.