a quest made by walking

journaling beside the path

"Walking opens us up. It feeds us. Image by image, it spoons up for us a broth or soup of soul food, which sustains us as we do the work necessary to shape and reshape our lives."
Julia Cameron, Vein of Gold

I'm becoming addicted to walking.

What started as a lark, a way to spend an afternoon and try my hand at taking pictures, has turned into a craving, a simple, stubborn need to get out there where the sky is blue, the grass is green and uncut, and walk. I am powerless against it, now bending to its will.

This may all seem nice and normal, but for me, it's been a struggle to get to this place. For the last four years or so, my various physical ailments have largely held me back from living a somewhat normal life. Constantly tired, needing naps in the afternoon, not being able to stay out late -- these things turned day and night into nothing more than a stage play I caught bits of between bouts of sleep. When awake, pains kept me immobile. For awhile, in the darker days, I rarely walked anywhere; I became trapped in my own house.

If you want proof of the healing powers of art, here I am. Art, joy, creativity, personal exploration -- I have been digging for four years, often through tears, to find a solution, a "fix." That magic solution that would heal all my woes. Nothing came easily, but now, for the first time, as I sit here, ready to go for my walk, I feel fantastic. Yes, I still have pain. But it's so small....we've become friends over the years, and I feel that we've reached an understanding.

*laughs* This post is going somewhere different than I planned. These things happen!

This will be my 102nd post on this blog. That's quite an accomplishment! And I need to say this: that having this blog, putting my art and words out there, meeting amazing people -- this has contributed greatly to my newfound health and happiness. Each one of you have given me a precious gift that I won't squander or waste. I am just so thankful. When I started, I had no idea how far I'd go....and look where i am! It shocks and amazes me every day, and sometimes, I feel like pinching myself.

I had dreams, back in college. Not one has come true. Perhaps what they say is true, that you never know what you need, only what you want. I think the biggest thing I've gotten back is FAITH. I'd lost it so long ago....to have it back....WOW!


I've a huge stack of papers, here, articles and art for the next issue of the 'zine. And the weather's beautiful outside. I believe a walk is in order. I leave you with images from Sunday's walk, all taken with my Polaroid camera.

big blue sky tears from a fallen tree a circle of trees green and blue