{ blue & yellow flowers, searching for perfectionism, pieces vs. pages }

blue & yellow

A new journal! I got in the mood to make a journal, so I sat down and made one...and remembered why I stopped making them myself -- they're hard and take a lot of work!

I've never done a half-bound one, though (and LOVE the look!), so it was kinda interesting to figure out how to do it. I saw this paper at Paper Source last week and knew it would make a cute journal cover. *G*

But as I gaze at it sitting on the couch arm next to me, all I can see are the imperfections. The loose signatures, the missed steps, the off measurements. How I still can't seem to cut down text blocks evenly. It's loose and maybe I've used store-bought ones too long to appreciate the imperfections present in my hand-made one? Why can't I seem to get past this? Can't I just use it and be happy?


I'll have to work through this. I always have other journals to work in. I just can't seem to be satisfied....

Something else I've been thinking about lately is Pieces Vs. Pages. Most of my artwork is in my journals. How can this be shown? Does it have the same value? How do I show this work off in coffee shops, etc? I can't just pull it out and hang it -- my pages are double sided. Do I HAVE a body of work or just books in a bookcase?

And then, there ARE some paintings, but every attempt I've made to sell them hasn't worked out. It makes me want to stay inside the journal where it's safe, where there are no expectations, where I can hide. Pretend to be an artist. Am I? What does that even mean?