{ day 22: time to hang back, choose, and DO }

tarot & journal

I've been questioning things lately. Trying to figure out where I am and where I'm supposed to go.

My grandmother always had a saying:

"You're always where you're supposed to be."

Lately, with all that's been happening with my family, it's become harder and harder to believe that. (It is because of family matters that I haven't been able to blog as often as I'd like -- that's what Twitter's for!) But isn't that the foundation of faith? That belief despite everything to the contrary?

One of my resolutions for this year is to do more spiritual work. So I pulled out my tarot cards; it's been a year since I last consulted them, and felt it was time to leap back into my faith, religion, whatever you may call it. And what did my tarot cards tell me?

Get off your ass, girl, and start DOING!

(I'm paraphrasing, of course)

Basically, there's all this stuff I want to do, but continue to let myself be distracted by television, the internet, reading novels, etc...and even if I DO spend my hour in the studio, I'm working in my journal, as that's what I love the most. I then received this advice from my dear friend Christine:

  "Maybe you love the idea of doing A, B and C, but you only have the time and energy to realistically pursue one of them...so you have to make a choice and then let go of the others, at least for the time being.  If you can pull off all three, great, but if you walk around thinking about all three doing but nothing about any of them because it's too overwhelming to consider trying to juggle them all...well that's a problem."

And that's exactly what I need to do. What we ALL need to do on our journeys. Chose. Make lists. Stop stretching ourselves too thin and focusing, you know?

So I'm going to "hibernate." Go into planning mode. Lists and reflection. No more creating new products or branching out on new adventures. More figuring out what it is I want to do, should be doing, and planning more. Because that's what I've seriously been lacking. Instead of letting the 'zine come together by fate, I'm going to think things through, plan deadlines, etc.

Not that new ventures aren't required, or bad. Just that doing them constantly means you're always distracted by so many different things.

So, I'm off to plan. What could use your focus today? What has overwhelmed you and needs you to make a conscious choice? Perhaps now is not the time for creating, but for thinking, reflecting, and doing in another way.