Reconnecting with my Art Journal

This just in: local girl misses her art journal!

I've been spending my time, as of late, coloring in mandalas, doodling, & painting. Which is awesome and so amazing and full of magic! 

But I realized I missing living in a sketchbook/art journal. Carrying a book around and gluing in paper scraps, drawing dreams, and writing - poetry, yearnings, or whatever other words are aching to come out. I pulled out my old issues of Play & Art & Life, paging through all the art...the raw pages, the scribbled words, the photos glued into painted spreads. 

In my yearning to paint more, I'd lost touch with what brought me here, to this point in my life.  

And so, when I was able to get to the studio, I immediately pulled out my Neocolor II crayons, spray inks, white paint, and neon color and just started playing around. No need for balance or perfect or thought - just a girl pouring out her heart on paper. 

I love, love the pages I created​! The colors and textures and mistakes. All of them. All I made. And I want to make more! 

I'm thinking of giving myself a 30 day challenge to get back to myself & my art journal. A way to be accountable. And maybe this will turn into something different because of my new knowledge and techniques and favorite supplies. I don't know. But I'm super psyched to find out. ​

Would you like to participate? I'm going to give myself a prompt list, & blog each day, even if I don't finish or only make a few marks. I have a lot going on, lots of moving, but I know I can make time for my art.  

I'm thinking I'd post each day, but have a separate blog for progress pics and tips that would be a $5-$10 donation thing (more for energy exchange than anything else). Thoughts?  

I'm off to draw my own mandalas...I think after all the coloring and embellishing I've done, it's finally time to branch out on my own.  

PS. I've been updating my Etsy shop with new work twice a week. Here's my newest piece! Don't forget - I do commissions!

we're all works in progress

I went into the studio the other night to work on a commission and a few other paintings for people, and ended up letting loose on a couple vaguely in-progress canvases, AKA pieces where the first few layers didn't work out so I paint over them until I like them. 

I think there are lessons in every stroke of the brush or line of the pencil. I've always been aware of the difficult point in every page and painting - I compare it to growing out your hair; it's great short, and you can't wait until it's long, but there's a middle point where it looks all wrong and you can't put it up but it's in your face that makes you want to give up. But if you stick with it, and let it grow, there are so many beautiful things you can do with it. 

Every day I go into the studio and pour myself into the paint, I engage in deeper conversation, one that is conducted without words - instead, it is all color and movement. Think of that time in Ratatouille when food is compared to music and color; that is what paint and crayons and paper are to me. Translations of those raw, vulnerable thoughts and emotions that are as tangled as a headphone cord in your pocket.

I love the wild spontaneity, the thrill of colors brushing up against each other. There is so much magic in the wild, heart-opening bravery of truly letting loose. Letting go of good and bad and just letting things be. 

I thought I knew what all this meant, but as I continue to grow, and open, and find a me that God has always seen, deep inside, I learn how tightly my bravery was, and how very much longer and wider I have to bloom. 

PS. I think only the last one is near being finished. There's just a bit more to be done. But I want to show all my imperfections and things-at-work because we're never really finished, just hit save at different moments. 

Plus, I love seeing color and texture and paintings & journal pages in progress, so that's what I share!  

PPS. Art Journal Summer Camp is coming up! Grab the bundle pack so you can play now while you wait for the bus to come and bring us to the virtual shore. I'd really love it if you came. I'll be sharing this lesson, & many more! 

Online Class Creation in 2014 (+ Friendly Faces!)

When I sat down at the beginning of the year and started mapping out a plan for 2014 — the creative projects that serve my circle best — I found myself daunted by the prospect of creating huge online classes. 

I love teaching. I really, really love putting together classes. I get super-excited and try to cram in as much as I possibly can, and after the cameras turn off, I suddenly have a list of things I forgot to include. I often over deliver, which is something I’ve been trying to work on, but am ultimately swept up in the current of ‘OMG but this is so cool, and so is this, and this!’ 

(It comes off a bit better when I’m teaching in person, mostly because I have an actual time limit.) 

The energy that comes from showing others what they never thought themselves possible of is the best in the world. That moment when a student looks up from the work in front of them and says, “I can’t believe I made this!” can instantly brighten any moment, and makes all the planning, prepping, and teaching worth it. 

But when I sat down to start brainstorming, I also remembered the stress of running an online class for months (a 6-8 week class is two months of weekly or bi-weekly work!). And while this is good for many people, it isn’t for me. By the end, I’m usually exhausted, and any joy I had in teaching the subject has dried up. 

The exception to this was Art Journal Summer Camp 2013 (and yes, there will be 2 sessions this summer!). I wanted to create a class that wasn’t a huge time commitment, taught techniques and ideas, and could be completed in the 2 weeks I’d set aside, just like real camp. 

Can I tell you….wow was there a real change in the energy when I could be there with my whole heart! It was marvelous and amazing! 

So I decided to do what works for me, as a teacher. What length/subject/format would best serve my best self? I think we’ve all seen what others do, and what works on the web, and feel we need to do it the same way — as if this is the accepted format we’re all adhering to. But here’s the thing:

There is no format. 

One of my favorite classes last year was short. I did it over three nights, taking 2 hours a night to put on Netflix and play. I loved it. 

For 2014, I’m going to try it my way. I’m going to craft workshops that don’t leave me exhausted after filming, that allow me to be excited and energetic the entire time, and that would work for me, as a student. 

The first of which is….

Granted, it isn’t a cleaver title, but I think you get the gist of what’s going on, here! 

When I first taught this class in person, I was working with people who weren’t mixed-media artists or art journalers (at least, not all of them were!). So I figured out a short-cut, and gave them guidance, and OH WOW did we have a blast! Just look at the diverse and beautifully self-reflective pieces they made! 

I lated introduced a shortened version in summer camp last year, and was again astounded by the work being created. Ever since then, I’ve wanted to create the full version I’d always had in my head. I was thinking about this at the studio last week and all of the sudden, I was standing in front of a huge pad of newsprint writing the entire PDF with a sharpie and some drawing crayons. What was supposed to be a 20 minute brainstorming session turned into 2.5 hours of writing, drawing, researching, & creating! 

If you want to draw self-portraits, or just girls in your journals, but feel like you’re no good at drawing, or maybe you want to improve your faces a bit, or perhaps you don’t think you can draw…this is for you. Even if you don’t like drawing, this is for you. 

But it’s deeper than that. It’s about being able to see who you are now, at the beginning of 2014, so you can reflect back on yourself at the end of the year. It’s about letting art get you in contact with your inner Self. It’s about saying screw you to teachers who said you weren’t “good at art” (or weren’t creative enough…a real criticism I got in my early 20’s!).

And if you don’t have a lot of time or energy? We’re gonna keep it to 5 videos. Shorter videos. Easy to digest. Take a weekend and work through the content or follow along during the week of live posting (after that, it’s self-study!). 

Oh, and did I mention it’ll be cheaper because it’s smaller? 

(Yeah, I’ve been listening!)

I basically see this as a win-win-win-win (I don’t stress-you can afford it-I get to teach-you get to make pretty things!). 

I’ll begin posting on January 27th, and by February 1st, it’ll be up and open for self-study. 

I have so much more to share about it, but I think I’ll pace myself. See, I’m already super-excited, but this blog post is already really long! 

Sign up now for $28 (you'll get an invite a week before class begins). Or wait to hear more about what I'll be teaching. Totally up to you! 

your willingness to be awed

Let me tell you: when you commit to a daily art practice, you go through some emotional upheaval. 

Working on art every day pulls more out of me, since instead of working on one painting or journal spread a week, I’m doing several. This means generating more ideas and trying to figure out what I want to create…what imagery do I want to paint? How do I want to draw my girls? Are there landscapes hiding behind them? What shapes and patterns am I drawn to? 

And these lead to the deeper questions, because they are the ones that fuel the art. How do you figure out what goes in the background of a painting without diving into the well of your own Self? It’s the only way to find that which you want to express, the subject matter you are willing to commit hours and hours of time with, drawing and refining and staring at again and again. 

I’ve never blurred the writing on a journal page before. I’ve held spreads back, but never hidden the words. I’m doing this so I can continue to be raw and honest in my journal without having the thought of what if I want to share this spread running through my head. 

It is simply a personal revelation about issues I was dealing with in high school that, honestly, I’d forgotten about until I was working through a simple little pet peeve of mine. The words appearing on the page were eye-opening, a true revelation that shed light on interpersonal relationships for the past, well, a long time! 

Be brave enough to take the plunge (hence the girl on the left-hand page, jumping off a cliffside into the deep blue ocean) and risk going too far! It can bring great comfort and wisdom into your life! 

peeling back layers with paint-covered fingers

Yesterday was the fifth day of daily painting for me, and the conclusion of my first week focusing on it for 4-6 hours a day.  

I spent that time alone. Which is scary -- when was the last time you came up against yourself, completely alone with your paintbrush?  

It has been so amazing, sharing this journey with all of you, reading your comments on how you get it , want to paint more, get stuck, thrash against Resistance. As artists, we going through many births in our lives, our styles changing as we claw our way into that onion that is our Souls, peeling back layers with paint-covered fingers. It is that yearning, that need  to know more, that keeps us going, curiosity throwing us into the sea of our own selves. We want more . We want to go deeper , and share how we experience life on the canvas or page or with clay or papers. 

Here's what I've learned about myself & my process this week:  

• Every time I have to make that next mark and can't make the decision, I jump for my phone to check random social media or my email. This is Resistance. I get uncertain and run away. I've started running less and less, or structure my time away from the canvas, and am getting more confident with my own expression.

• I can't listen to the radio while working. It influences my work too much, sways my mood with the words. It also annoys me. The best thing for me? Movies or shows playing on my iPad. I don't actively watch them, but the dialogue and story comforts me without influencing me as I paint. 

• I get too wrapped up in shading things "realistically." I actually chatted with a couple of you over on Instagram about this; despite knowing my style, wanting to be free, and having a vision in my head or instincts that say otherwise, I feel as though things don't look right or aren't done "correctly" unless I shade them right. This is bullshit. Excuse the language, but it's the best word for it. Why can't we simply paint what makes us happy, follow our instincts, and allow things to be ? I am trying to let go of this the best I can -- when I started doing portraits, I was very precise and technical, but now... Let's dismiss this silly notion of perfection or reality or what makes things "acceptable." I have a beautiful watercolor of a girl playing the guitar up where I work to remind me that simple = beautiful. And I'll leave complicated paintings to others. 

•  In the silence, I found more of myself. Sometimes, I'd simply sit and think . I'd doodle in my sketchbook all the thoughts in my head and things I'd experienced in my life. Happy and sad. I had the room to figure out how I truly felt and was able to work through some more complicated emotions. Funnily enough, the big painting I'm working on? Her hair is the same color as mine. Wonder if there's a reason for that... ;) 

Many nights, I didn't want to go home, despite being exhausted. I wanted to stay and play and paint and keep going. I thought this was going to be a week-long experiment. Now? I am sure I'll be spending three days a week there painting, either in my art journal or on canvas. It's so revealing. And I've let go of that notion that everything that I paint has to be done and a print and a painting....they can be bad. It's about the journey  I'm making while being there!

Years ago, I read an interview with Teesha Moore where she suggested you go an entire day without talking to anyone else and spend it in your art journal. At the time, I didn't think much of it. But now? I think she's onto something! 

So here are the action shots from yesterday. They're still unfinished, but I'm now confident they won't stay that way for long! 

One last thing: a couple of you asked about the faux-stitching I did on the other paintings....here's an iPhone video of how I did it! 

the doubt that is necessary to faith & grace

Stick with me - this metaphor is from a sci-fi show, but perfectly illustrates what I'm feeling.

Earlier today, I wrote about self-doubt and trying to figure out why I keep running away when I have to make decisions when I'm painting. One of you wrote back, asking how I could possibly doubt myself.

There isn't exactly language to describe this kind of doubt. It isn't that of the Soul or the Self -- it's of the Artist Self, those moment before birth when you know  wonderful things are about to come out into the world, but you're just before that when it's painful and confusing and moving in hyper-realism and you wonder how you got there in the first place. It's the doubt that comes before a fever breaks and you've been sick for ages. It is the doubt that is necessary to faith & grace. 

So, in this show I watch, Haven , Audrey had to open a door. She had to find it, first, as the world began to crumble around her, and she had a guide, trying to help her remember herself. But it wouldn't work if just she opened the door; her friends had to on the other side, too. And when she opened that door, what awaited her was a desert wasteland, a green and white shining scape of fast moving clouds and mountains in the distance, and she had to cross it on faith alone . 

Right. I'm sure a sci-fi dreamscape looks awesome  to jump out into on faith that there's a magic door on the other side. 

And that's where I am. I've opened the door, I'm looking out across, and I'm taking my first steps. It's scary and overwhelming and larger than life, and I know I'll get through to the other side, but as you're stepping out, you have doubt.  

I'm running less. And found my flow.  

Here are some action shots from the day... 

what do i need to howl into life?

After weeks of a migraine and a few more spent working tirelessly to get Gelli Plate Junk Journal content finished on time, I decided I needed a week "off" of computer work. It was time, I felt my Soul tell me, to sit down and paint.  

I have several half-completed pieces, started in the thick of things, born from excitement and passion that were pushed off to the side when other work came through and became more "important." And sure, when other projects where drying, I'd putter around with these...but I knew  an entire week devoted to just painting  would be restorative and inspiring. 

I've felt, lately, that there's one little piece blocking my true  expression of creativity. A blockage I can't seem to get around, past, dissolve, break free of. I knew of this when I went to Florida in September, and felt a little of it loosen up, but with everything that's happened and been going on these past two months, well...it's still there. I felt more shift today, but feel so close  and know  this week is going to truly help me clear it away completely. 

 "we are all birds" 6"x6" mixed media on board. available.

I finished this one today; putting my signature on something really excites me and I feel like I've been uber-productive! You may remember this as the canvas I started at Roben-Marie's house way back in the beginning of September. It sat half-finished and I really didn't know where to go with it....well...here it is! It just came together in a burst of inspiration and intuition, and the words were spoken deep inside me. 

When I took my break, I paged through 14 Artists' Journals by Orly Avineri -- there are some beautiful, soul*full pages in there -- and was so moved to share my own Soul and reach deep inside to make sense of myself, I had to jump up and work in my art journal. I had my smaller Dylusions in my bag, so I pulled it out, slapped down some paint, made marks with Neocolor II watercolor crayons, and added faux stitching with one of my favorite new easy tools before stamping out my thoughts with stamps. I've wanted to do this for so long....why did I wait in the first place?!

acrylic paint, distress stains, Neocolor II, washi tape, scrapbooking paper, rubber stamps

added collage elements from magazines, more paint, stamping, & stickles

I am thrashing and diving and living days full of paint and silence. What are you up to these days? 

Giant Art Photobomb GO!

Wow! Running an online class seems to grab all my attention; everything has been filmed, though, and last night, after 3.5 hours of working, we headed off for a good dinner of crab legs to celebrate. 

I spent the day cleaning my patio, moving furniture,  & putting up Halloween decorations. I'm not a huge fan of Halloween-y stuff (I know...surprising, right?), but for some reason, have felt the need to make the world around me festive, fun, & positive. Cleanliness and incense and pretty decorating! 

(Keep reading; this is an art journal photobomb post!) 

Okay, so I don't have very many decorations, but I did the best with what I have! I love those little pumpkin lights, even though they don't light up. 

Now that things are nice and clean and moved, I can sit outside in the cool desert air and play in my journals. This weekend is for relaxation and filling the well; creating stories with drawings and paints and markers, doodling shapes and ships on the sea. Expressing all the uncertainty I feel. 

I think, when we come out on the other side of something, a prolonged period of turbulence or illness in our lives, it's natural to question the lesson behind it. I've found myself writing my questions in my art journals, layers of colorful marker-scrawled words hidden under paint and collage.  

 blick matte acrylics, collage materials, prismacolor markers, gold oil pastel, signo white gel pen

distress stains, signo white gel pen

distress stains, gold acrylic paint, black craft paint, white signo gel pen

The rest of my time has been consumed with Gelli Printing! 

 For me, whenever I teach a class, I find myself uber-excited to share every little thing I know, & any waining passion is reignited; I have tried so many new things lately, and just adore re-exploring my gelli plate through the eyes of my students. 

One of their favorite things is how I clean my plate. I originally learned this from Carla Sonheim and fell in love -- it's perfect for art journalers because the technique creates instant backgrounds to play on, and is so textured and full of color, I just love looking at them! How do you do it? Simply cover your plate with a layer of craft paint, put it down in your journal, and let it dry -- easy peasy! Here are some in my various journals...

Okay, this last one is a combination of techniques and an example from one of the lessons that I'm doodling on with the best pen in the world, the Pilot Permaball. Roben-Marie parted with one from her stash for me to try this discontinued pen. It write over ANYTHING and dries totally permanent. I adore it, but only pull it out when it'd be the best tool since I'll have to order more online when it runs out. Still...so, so nice! You can't get them in stores anymore, but can grab them at the Scarlet Lime shop. 

The last thing I'm sharing today in this art photobomb is the junk journal I finished for the Gelli Print Junk Journal class. BTW, we're having SO MUCH FUN....after just a week, the girls are totally blown away and learning new things. I'm going to take my mother's advice and brag about myself for a moment by sharing a few things they've said: 

Miriam C:

"I have seen tons of videos but your video from yesterday's class has refreshing new techniques I haven't seen before. I considered myself pretty proficient on the Gelli Plate but yesterday I learn tons of new things. And we are only in our first week of class. I am absolutely loving the class. If you are reading this post I would urge you to sign up for Samie Harding Gelli Plate ecourse."

Vickie P:

"Seriously, you changed my printing style for the better today as I worked. I learned more from you than I realized until I put it into practice! This class ROCKS! Thank you!"

Genevive C: 

"I have watched countless Gelli printing YouTube videos, and I've already learned several new things. And I just received my round Gelli plate, so I'm definitely going to play with that." 

I have been SO happy and encouraged by all they're saying and creating! I've really learned to hold space and share from my heart; I have learned I have so much to share in this life, and really need to get on doing so! 

(You can join us at any time!)

Phew! That was a lot of pictures! Photobomb DONE!  

By the way, did you catch this week's episode of Journal Girl in the Studio? I reviewed Blick Matte Acrylics and played with them in my art journal.  

While you go watch that, I'm going to head outside and play! It's beautiful outside and I just found neon Prismacolor markers -- OMG, they're gorgeous! But that's for another day!